What a horrid place. Incredibly rude staff. You'd have a better holiday in Clacket Lane service station.
We arrived to a queue of cars and a giant board with 'Parking 5 Euro' written on it. After five minutes someone wordlessly shoved a badly printed flyer for the restaurant through our door. When we got to the front of the queue, a stern matronly lady demanded our 'papers'. We'd booked last minute, so we were lacking the 'fast check in' paperwork that she seemed to expect. Given we had small tired kids, it really would have taken only a little bit of initiative to welcome us, and to advise us where we could park and have a drink, instead of pushing us to queue immediately to get our paperwork and check in.
The cottage was extremely small and ugly. We'd booked a 'family' cottage. The third room was so small you had to climb onto the bed to close the door if the travel cot was assembled.
There was no oven (I'd bought a frozen pizza imagining it to be an easy evening meal for us). The kitchen was so small that the kitchen bin was in the bathroom. Not exactly nice to bathe with the odour of kitchen scraps.
The mattresses were dire. The kind of thing they used to have in institutions. Thin foam covered in thick plastic. The lady at reception said that this was necessary for hygiene. I'm not sure what people get up to on those mattresses, but I've stayed in plenty of hotels and holiday villages and never slept on anything so unpleasant.
But this was a long anticipated holiday with my family. We got up the next morning, determined to make a fresh start and get into the holiday spirit. Swimming! What time do your kids wake up? Mine get up around 6 a.m.. The swimming pool doesn't opens until 10! We wandered across a little early, thinking we could stop for breakfast out. What could be more natural than to treat your kids to a cafe breakfast on holiday? We hadn't booked the 'package' breakfast. The normal cafe didn't open until.... you guessed it, 10. It really rather misses the benefit of staying somewhere with a swimming pool onsite. Is it really so difficult to open earlier?
So we were hanging around in the shopping bit (really odd - ugly cramped concrete hangar with palm cramped in trying to look like a tropical paradise. A puddle of water literally 1 ft deep with Koi miserably thrashing about. Not somewhere I would ever choose to spend time). It was about ten to ten - and we saw that the rope barrier leading to the swimming pool had been moved aside. We tried our swipe cards, and the gate opened to let us into the pool. Through the glass, we could see some people swimming. Was it so unreasonable of us to think that they had opened the pool ten minutes early?
The answer is: yes. We got ourselves and our small children changed and into the pool area. We were immediately aggressively challenged by a cleaner. I apologised for the misunderstanding, but indicated that we would hang around by the bit where the exit to the changing rooms were. Apparently this was not enough - clearly I was expected to lead my disappointed children back to the changing room, get them changed back into their clothes, and wait outside the gates.... for the ten minutes until the official opening times. The cleaner went to get re-enforcements and I was challenged by SIX further separate staff members. SIX people trying to bully a mother and her children to exit the premises. One of them asked me how I had got in (obviously suggesting that I has sneaked in through a back entrance). When I explained, he took it upon myself to go out to the front to check my story (i.e. insinuating that i was lying). He then came back and said that the Kayaking acitvity had started in the pool at 9.30 a.m. and had not put the barrier back. It's unfortunate, but it should have been clear that we entered the pool in good faith. To be clear, I wasn't swimming. I was just waiting.
The pool itself was OK, but lacked anywhere t actually swim. It was just queue and flume, queue and flume. A bit busy and noisy, and some pretty full-on heavy petting going on in the Jungle River. I've nothing against teenagers - but, back to my earlier point, it would have been much more pleasant to have been able to have had a 'toddler' early session where we could just splash in the baby pool without the big flumes and the competition for seating.
We stayed at a Landal park the previous week, and it was far nicer even though the facilities were less grand.
Nothing to like about the place at all. They take advantage of the captive market. Everything is done to the minimum possible standard - then a bit less. Depressing and horrid.
This review is the subjective opinion of a TripAdvisor member and not of TripAdvisor LLC