Unfortunately the worst ice cream we have ever had in our lives. Admittedly, expectations were high. The enormous variety of exciting flavours offered, written on a board outside on a sunny April day, led us to believe that this was an expert purveyor of iced...goods. How wrong we were.
We decided to get four different flavours between the two of us as we wanted to tickle our tastebuds in as many ways as possible within our budget of £8.40 i.e. the cost of two two-scoop waffle cones, and the serving lady kindly allowed me to have a small amount of one extra flavour on top, taking our total to five. It gives me no pleasure to say that we might as well have got five scoops of the same flavour as they tasted identical. We were faced with a watery, gritty, slushy, icy substance faintly reminiscent of weak milky tea, in five different colours. We're talking slivers of pure ice, by the way.
The individual flavours - A Date with Honey [dates and honey], Peaches on the Beaches [Allegedly peach with homemade tablet], Marie Antoinette [strawberry jam,cream,cake], Pomegranate and Raspberry Sorbet, and Zesty Lemon were as discernible as a faint whisper across a crowded room. Ironically the Zesty Lemon, the flavour we had been warned could be somewhat overpowering, was the worst of all and about as punchy as an octogenarian facing Mike Tyson.
As an aside, I have travelled through many foreign lands and tasted varieties of iced cream, both within the boundaries of our humble nation but also the motherland of iced cream and creamed ice, Italy. These global meanderings had foolishly led me to believe that ice cream had reached a base level of tastiness, whereby anyone jumping on the glacial production bandwagon was free to adopt the tried and tested methods. Whereby a product could be created which was at the very least predictable and ticking a certain ice-cream shaped box. This ticked no such box. Perhaps this was related to the exciting looking but clearly dysfunctional large metal machine behind the till where new flavours - or new names for the same flavour - are invented each day.
My friend hypothesised that the tastemaker's sense of taste and smell could have been adversely affected by Covid-19. One red flag was that when I asked the serving lady which her favourite was out of two of the flavours, she said she DIDN'T KNOW!!! This could be why.
Worst of all I now feel environmentally unethical as when I threw my cone out of the window as we drove out of the town, the serviette went with it. I can only hope no local livestock had the misfortune to encounter my deserted dessert.More