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Need some space....where should I go?

Whangarei, New...
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Need some space....where should I go?

Hi TA family.

My husband and I have recently decided to take a period of separation. I feel like I have lost myself in our marriage and kids and am a shadow of a person. I have always wanted to travel and see the world - I grew up in England and have visited most of Europe and Australia as well as short stays in Singapore and Malaysia (Langkawi). I now live in New Zealand.

I want to get away - he has said he's happy to look after the kids while I do so. Thing is, I'm not sure what to do. Where do I go? I've always wanted to go to Petra, see the Northern lights, and generally immerse myself in the culture and beauty of the world. Perhaps a slightly romantic wonderlust type view of it, but there you go.

I would be on my own as a young white female. I would like to feel busy and not lonely, but have time out and relax as well, if that makes sense. Should I do a tour? Should I just grab a backpack and wing it?

Help....!

Las Vegas, Nevada
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1. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

How long and how soon are the two preliminary questions.

Petra is supposed to be incredible. I know very well-traveled people who think it's the most incredible place they've ever seen. (I've not been.) But, given your distance, it would be done as part of much larger, much longer trip, maybe tacked onto a trip to Turkey and the Balkans.

But it sounds like you are into antiquities and the beauty of nature more than the great art and architecture of the European capitals. So I'll throw a preliminary suggestion that would be subject to change based on further information. But given that you like to see the remains of lost civilizations from long ago, you want to see the beauty or nature, you need some solitude and a spiritual experience, but not necessarily isolation. And you want to be able to organize the trip when the time is right.

Have you thought about Peru?

Whangarei, New...
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2. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

Thanks for your prompt reply :)

I think you get me. That's exactly what I need right now, although I do love art and architecture (I love the Louvre, those ceilings.....wow!), I don't want that at the moment.

how long? Ideally months on end, getting work where I could!! Haha but the practicality of having children rules that out. I think 3 weeks.

how soon? As soon as possible.

I like the thought of SEA (cheap, easy to get to, beautiful etc), but I get the impression it seems to be mostly partying and temples.....can someone correct me on this?

I hadn't considered Peru....does it have beaches?? I do love the beach. I have been doing some searching and places like Costa Rica and Malaysia/Borneo are cropping up as appealing places.

Edited: 16 January 2014, 21:45
Whangarei, New...
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3. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

I am a PADI qualified diver, and like a mix of adventure and relaxation. I want to get out of my comfort zone and push the limits :)

Las Vegas, Nevada
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4. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

Peru does have beaches, although it's not a "beach holiday" type of destination. But here's an article on the best beaches in Peru: visitperu.net/top-attractions/top-10-beaches…

It's not the Caribbean or Brazil by any stretch of the imagination, so if you want something more "beachy," you could combine Peru with a more traditional beach-type destination, such as Costa Rica or Panama or the Caribbean coast of northern Colombia.

Las Vegas, Nevada
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5. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

Revised suggestion based on the diving post that I just saw:

The Yucatan peninsula of Mexico, Belize and Guatemala. Explore the ruins of Mayan civilization in the Yucatan interior and Guatemala. Dive in Belize. Soak up the sun on the beaches of Yucatan Mexico.

kent
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6. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

mrsg15..... as you have only a 3 week break, what do you want to get from your trip?

An opportunity to step outside your comfort zone perhaps? Or do you want to learn something new, and if so, what? A period of reflection or distraction? The chance to experience being solo again for a short while?

Putting practicalities aside (weather, visa's, money etc) there are countless places to see and things to discover.

Perhaps one way to make a decision is to say to yourself...I've always want to ....and plan for that.

Whangarei, New...
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7. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

After discussion I can have 1 or even 2 months away to really get the chance for some space.

Thank you so much for your suggestions it's nice to know there are people reading this and wanting to point me in the right direction :)

When I picture this time away I see myself meeting new people both local and fellow travellers, relaxing, absorbing the beauty of the world and different cultures Walter Mitty-style, and doing some slightly crazy adventure type things, to push and explore my limits.

When you mention learning new things, I could see myself taking a half day cooking class or something, if that's what you mean.

Exploring being 'single' again, not so much :)

Thanks again

Edited: 17 January 2014, 00:55
London, England
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8. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

I snorkel rather than dive, but the best snorkelling I ever came across was in Palau and I have been told that the diving is equally wonderful there. I stayed at the Carolines Resort in an individual fairly basic cabin with a balcony and a view of the magnificent bay (breakfast was served on the balcony). It is up the hill from the Palau Pacific Resort and has day privileges there. The dive shop at PPR is excellent and I found the people staying at the Palau Pacific resort very friendly. The island is beautiful and relaxing. I spent half a day on one of the rock islands in the main bay, but I didn't get to the lake where you can snorkel with stingless jellyfish.

Palau would also mix nicely with Kosrae (in the Federated States of Micronesia) where the Kosrae Nautilus Resort has excellent diving and your fellow visitors are likely to be with Green Peace, the Australian Navy or marine biologists. There is also said to be terrific diving on some of the other islands in the FSM.

It would also mix well with Borneo. I prefer Sarawak to Sabah (less backpackerish) but there are mountains to climb in Sabah. However, Kuching in Sarawak is a delightful and fascinating city but relaxed as well. The fairly equal mix of Malay, Chinese and Tribal peoples in Sarawak adds greatly to the atmosphere and it is easy to organise excursions to more remote places.

Having read "The Gift of Rain" I want to go to Penang. You might want to read it and see how you feel.

And/or consider Vietnam for more diving or Laos. Both would be much less party central than Thailand.

The advantage of being a diver is that there is a whole community out there ready to welcome any other diver.

On the other, slightly different hand, Belize would probably have enough to keep you interested and happy for a month. There is great diving, Mayan temples, and rain forests. Xanadu, on Ambergris Caye, has kitchens in their rooms, a very pretty pool, hammocks on a pier and, as it is a 20 minute walk from San Pedro, is close enough to enjoy the town whilst being quiet when you want it to be.

Belize City is not a safe place to wander, but the rest of Belize is fine for solo travel and staying in two or three places could be interesting.

Belize is in Central America but is culturally part of the Caribbean. As a former British colony the language is English.

I have been to Petra and it is quite wonderful, even with all the people who insist in taking flash photos during the otherwise magical night visit (despite a request by the organisers not to). There are also other places in Jordan very much worth seeing, but I organised my trip to Petra as part of a 3 1/2 week trip that included Aswan, Cairo and Damascus. all of which may be off the travel menu for a bit longer. It may also be a rather cold there now.

However, assuming you are going now and if you don't mind cold weather, you could consider Japan. I find it the most comfortable place to travel as a solo woman, it is incredibly easy to travel around (the signs in the railway station are also in English) and the countryside is very beautiful.

Japan is much less expensive than is generally thought and I find it a very good place for contemplating life. Outside of Tokyo even inexpensive business hotels have a gender segregated hot soaking bath, often on the roof. Lying in hot water looking at the stars puts lots of things in perspective.

If you would like help organising such a trip, have a look at the self-guided adventures or a tailored trip by Inside Japan. They can also organise cooking lessons, sumo match tickets, hiking, river rafting, taiko drumming or the occasional private guide and give you a 24/7 emergency number to ring in case of difficulties.

insidejapantours.com/fully-tailored-japan-ho…

Edited: 17 January 2014, 18:54
Somerset
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9. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

You mentioned Borneo which I was thinking of when I was reading your first and second post.

It is beautiful and so much to see. Temples that are beautiful, the lovliest mosques (in Brunei too), wonderful forests with the orangutangs, the snorkeling from Kota Kinaabalu, my favourite the small seldom visited Mamutik is small and quiet.

The people are lovely. Lots of roadside markets and the pearl market.

London, England
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10. Re: Need some space....where should I go?

Sue has a very good point. How could anyone wanting a sense of adventure not want to go to Borneo!